Study finds drinking from the hose is good for you

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By Jeremy Sollars

A new study released today by the CSIRO has confirmed that drinking water from a garden hose has positive health benefits.
The study reveals that Australians born before 1980 who regularly drank from the garden hose during their childhood have a 90 to 95 per cent higher immunity to infectious disease than those born after that time.
It has also been revealed that riding your bike all day without a helmet wasn’t dangerous at one time, and that if you were smacked as a child you are probably tougher than the kids of today, who’ve never had to get up off the couch to manually change the three available channels on the TV.
The principal author of the study, Professor William Brogan, told the Free Times the findings would come as a shock to millennials, who the study also reveals should have spent their childhoods playing in the dirt and “drinking some cement to harden up”.
He said the study also found that despite members of the pre-1980’s Generation X having spent their formative years doing chores for their parents, eating simple foods like Weet-Bix for breakfast and bangers and mash for dinner, singing the national anthem when school started and coming home when the streetlights came on they “still turned out OK”.
“And they didn’t have to text their friends to see if they were at home, they just went around and hoped they were there,” Prof Brogan confirmed.
“The study also shows members of Generation X were forced to download the ‘Top 40’ from the radio onto cassette tapes, went to bed at the same time every night, hardly ever had takeaway and frequently swam in the creek.
“They also showed others a bit of respect and had some common sense.
“They were able to walk around the streets at night and feel safe, but if they became involved in a fight it was one-on-one, not 40 on one.”
• Millennials, also known as Generation Y, are the generational demographic cohort following Generation X. They are the generation born in the 1980s and 1990s, comprising primarily the children of the baby boomers and typically perceived as increasingly familiar with digital and electronic technology.
• Weet-Bix is a high-fibre and low-sugar breakfast cereal biscuit manufactured in Australia and New Zealand by the Sanitarium Health and Wellbeing Company, and in South Africa by Bokomo.
• Bangers and mash, also known as sausages and mash, is a traditional dish of the British Isles made of sausages and mashed potatoes, and may consist of one of a variety of flavoured sausages made of pork, lamb, or beef. The dish is sometimes served with onion gravy, fried onions, or peas. (Source – Wikipedia)

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